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Paul Cohen |
Personal details (the usual rubbish...)
Age 30 yrs, height 6' 0", weight 11.5 st, job; Systems Developer National Land Survey of Sweden (M.Sc. Computer Science and Technology). Registered player with Abyggeby FK. Looking for a transfer contract with the Cybury Gooners.
Previous teams
Lunds FF, Lokomotiv Lund, Abyggeby FK.
Position
Midfield or in a dark corner of the closest pub. (And never never never in goal).
Transfer market price tag
A couple of pints of Guinness. I'd also need a decent job in the London area, but I don't know if the Cybury board of directors would give their OK on that, with this Bosman stuff and all ...
Player you think you are
Liam Brady, Bo Larsson (Midfield/forward genius of the great Malmoe FF team of the 70's and of the Swedish national XI).
Player other people think you are
I am not sure, though I have often been accused of displaying unprovoked psychotic behaviour on the pitch. When younger I got booked for arguing with the ref to much. With age comes wisdom and maturity, nowadays I am exclusivly booked for foul play.
Favourite moment in football (watching)
Last five minutes of the 1979 FA Cup final. Malmoe FF - Wisla Krakow 4-2 (0-1) 1979 Champions Cup QF.
Favourite moment in football (when you were playing)
Scoring a hattrick in my first game for Lunds FF (12 years old). Scoring my first goal for my current club Abyggeby after going 21 games without scoring.
Most embarrassing moment (when you were playing)
I'm too psyched up when on the field to sense any embarrassment about anything I do, though I am often told afterwards that I should be ashamed of my behavoiur.
Most hated Scum player (ie. Tottenham Hotspur)
Ricardo Villa.
Most hated Scum player (ie. Internet Hotspur)
Haven't met any yet. Shouldn't the question be "Most hated Scum"? Scum and player beeing a contradiction in terms.
Nastiest injury
Ligaments in both feet torn to pieces on a number of occasions.
Greatest moment of Cybury career
Yet to come. I gave up dreaming of playing for Arsenal and Malmoe FF at the same time I discovered Guinness. My sole remaining football dream is to play a game for the famed Cybury Gooners.
Football-related claim to fame
Martin Dahlin is from the same Swedish town where I grew up. A bloke in my former club met Dahlin at a pub and beeing under the strong influence of copious amounts of beer, gave him a once in a lifetime contract offer; "If you play just one game for us you can f**k my girlfriend". Dahlin kindly answered that he would take the offer into consideration.
Will appearing in a glossy national magazine change your life?
...
How many Darren Skeelses are there?
According to the rumours, quite a few. But then rumours are just rumours.
Have you got a home page on the web? If so, what address?
Yup. I live alone in the cold north of Sweden. There's nothing else to do here apart from shooting polarbears and waiting for the global warming to start up. http://www.lm.se/~paul