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Matt Powell |
Personal details (the usual rubbish...)
Obligatory big bloke of the team at 6 foot 4 hence. Normally found hanging around in either penalty box or dodgy nightclubs in Nottingham. A bit of a Carlton Palmer being only 13 stone. Now 25 and still just as stupid as I ever was. Presently finishing off a PhD in chemistry, about to be laid off from my present job of driving and today crashing a disabled student minibus.
Player you think you are
Generally put in one of two positions, centre forward and centre half. Given this is an Arsenal supporters team, there are far too many centre halves so I tend to find myself up front. I am also the only keeper with a completely clean sheet record, having faced a half against the mighty Bala attack with the only shot on target was a lob when I was on the line.
Player other people think you are
Bench warmer and occasional linesman. Bloody pain for always turning up late for Rolfe & Nolan games. Mad for travelling all the way down from Nottingham for 45 minutes of footie.
Favourite moment in football (watching)
The last 5 minutes of an Arsenal game from the late eighties. It was such fun cheering Perry as he sprinted off down the right wing aimlessly chasing the ball. With regular occurance he would somehow set up a late winner.
Favourite moment in football (when you were playing)
A curler from the goal-line and edge of penalty box that beat everyone. The keeper was waiting at the far post so I just curled it inside the near post. I almost got sent off directly for scoring too many goals. If I remember rightly I was playing for some Methodists against some Catholics, don't ask me why.
Most embarrassing moment (when you were playing)
It has to be my inspired 30 yard back pass that beat my own keeper when I played for the cubs. The opposing forward was away and with a last ditch tackle 40 yards out I slid in and took the ball off him only for it to fly into the back of the net (TM every 'football on the internet' article) from 50 yards with the keeper too busy gassing to his mate behind the goal.
Most hated Scum player (ie. Tottenham Hotspur)
It used to be the Fat B***ard himself, but seeing as he's well gone, eerm? I don't know really. I tend not to think of them at all as it upsets my stomach too much. I have always had a particular loathing for Justin Edinburgh though. Mainly cos he's an ugly Scum player (who needs swearing when you've got insults like that?). Is it a coincidence that both of these players have been seen blubbing after losing a semi-final? I must ask David Platt's shrink.
Most hated Scum player (ie. Internet Hotspur)
It's going to be a unanimous vote for that greasy fat sod who hacks anything that comes near him, normally Adam Rose, isn't it? No contest really.
Nastiest injury
The worst I've recieved from playing football is a torn thigh muscle from a rather high, it has to be to reach my thigh, tackle from a "commited" he should be midfielder. I think I can claim to be the giver of the nastiest though. In a recent Sunday league game I stopped the friendly match just after coming on with a sliding tackle (clean and fair, honest) which resulted in a dislocated foot and fractured tibia for the opponent. He apparently had a plate inserted too! I walked off sheepishly with the rest of my side as the ambulance drove past.
Greatest moment of Cybury career
One of three events. For the glory of it all I would say the last minute winner against South London Raiders at Xmas '95. What a way to get over being dumped! I'd suggest it to everyone. I was also dead chuffed with my performance against ALS when I marked the one striker out of the game so well he kept wandering off to midfield to get away from me. It won me the man of the match award (ie. a print out of the match report) from one of our team, but the Judas still didn't pick me for the next game v Spurs ;). Finally the other great moment when I raised my flag to signal a scum player offside when they finally got past the halfway line. Call yourself an Arsenal supporting side? Where's the dodgy offside trap then?
Football-related claim to fame
The most recent is meeting Mark Crossley, Forest keeper, down the Black Orchid last Wednesday. He later came up to me and shook my hand to say bye at the end of the evening. Or it might have been to tell me to stop eyeing up his attractive partner. I also know Pete "Friend of The Stars" Northcott. Is he trying to set himself up as an agent or what?
Will appearing in a glossy national magazine change your life?
Hopefully this new found stardom will wisk me away on a rollercoaster ride of fame, fortune, internet groupies and tropical islands. I'll become a raging alcoholic, well even more than I am now, and be forced to retire from very unprofessional football at the age of 27. Then I'll be forced to come out of the woodwork some 20 years later as the expert pillock on The Tyne Tees Match. Then again one person may inadvertantly glance and wonder who that lanky bloke in the black is. I know at least 25 people will see my picture. The rest of the saddos who were in the picture.
How many Darren Skeelses are there?
I always thought there was only one slow moving variety, but thinking about it there must be quite a few. Otherwise how does he keep all his misses happy? Boom boom! Then again that might be the reason he's always knackered.
Have you got a home page on the web? If so, what address?
I haven't got one personally but there are a couple of pictures of me supposedly at work at http://www.ccc.nottingham.ac.uk/~pczpra/Chemistry/Physical/MHey.html I'm the one sitting down in both photos, good practice for Cybury games.